Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in
overalls and looks like work.

Looking for a helping hand?  There's one on your arm.

Do not disturb.  Already disturbed!

Never put off till tomorrow what you can avoid all together.

It's not so bad being senile; you get to meet many more people.

Where there's smoke, you'll find my wife cooking dinner.

You can't scare me - I have children!

Multitasking = screwing up several things at once.

Where there is a will, there's an attorney.